Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
