there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
