Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize