I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize