the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
