is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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