Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Randomize
