She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize