went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize