So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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