first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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