Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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