Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
