if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize