dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
