Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize