a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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