Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
