So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
