Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
