haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Randomize
