you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
