with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
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