This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
