Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
