chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
