Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Alive.
So much puke
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
