Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
