That's intense
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize