How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
