i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize