i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
But break dance skills will only take you so far
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
