Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
