O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
