Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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