my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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