remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
