Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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