the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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