Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize