There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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