So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
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