Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.

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(309): View more from Illinois

Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

So squirting runs in the family.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.

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(701): View more from North Dakota

He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!

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(443): View more from Maryland

Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.

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(586): View more from Michigan

ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.

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