Apparently you make a good broom.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
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Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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