can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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