im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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