I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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