I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
