I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
