Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize